I have never heard it put that way until our Indian guide asked if our son’s marriage was an“Arranged Marriage”or a “Love Marriage”…..what?
Imagine a country of a billion people who in many parts still practice such a tradition. You may recall my last post had a picture of a 12th century 300′ tower in Dehli. We learned they had to close the access to the top because distraught couples, unhappy with their parents’ marriage choice, were leaping to their death. This is a 4,500 year old culture full of unbelievable talent. But, also such paradoxical tradition.
There’s so much to learn about India and its history. I take back comments from an earlier post this week. After driving 500 miles the last three days, visiting scores of cities and villages, and talking to many Indians, there’s a remarkable history here. And once out of Dehli, it was quite apparent India is truly an economic threat.
Speaking of talent, check out this Neemrana Palace/Fort built in the 1400’s and recently turned into a resort. It seems odd we have heard so much about old Italian, French, or Greek architecture but never about Indian. This place was remarkable. First, it sits 700 feet up on a mountain side. Check out the beauty of these doors that still work 600 years later. The gardens and architectural detail throughout were just stunning.
It’s not the Taj Mahal, but remarkable all the same. And I’ve only shared pictures of a few buildings. Temples,
forts and shrines, dating back 800-900 years, are everywhere. It’s hard to grasp how much talent these Indians have and have demonstrated for thousands of years.
But, back to this “Arranged or Love Marriage” issue. Ponder the message to a child when you tell them what career they will pursue and what spouse they will marry. It’s clear they must be submissive and follow along. That’s a message that doesn’t build passion and commitment, nor curiosity and innovation. In fact, our one night’s stay at this fairy tale fort above would pay the rent for five months of the hundreds who served us. It makes you feel quite undeserving.
People in the north here are kind, gentle, and just follow along. But as you move south, where much of this autocratic attitude has disappeared, you can see
and feel these people coming alive. The skyline is dotted with sky cranes and there is construction everywhere. That is where the economic engine is. That is where our new global competition is already developing.
Having spent 25 hours in a hot bus the last three days one’s mind ponders a bit. I kept thinking…how about our faith in Christ? How about the faith of those in our congregation. Is it an “Arranged Marriage” with Christ out of convenience? An arranged faith that neatly fits into OUR LIFE? Or is it a “Love Marriage” that is growing deeper and deeper in our understanding and commitment to get beyond ourselves and serve others? Are we actually building our spiritual muscle and becoming an authentic engine for Christianity in our communities? How about your church….how about your own journey…I’d love your comments.
Hey Dad,
I’m enjoying your posts on India…travelling really gives you a new perspective on the world doesn’t it? So when are you guys scheduled to arrive back in the states?
Love you and missing you,
Ash
Ash,
We get back into Chicago Tuesday morning at 5:00am….home about 9:00 or so.
Dad
Hi, I am an Indian who lives in US. I was googling for something when I came across this post. I am a south Indian and I was glad to read your comments on South Indians
When you talk about arranged marriage and Christ, I think the world has a different opinion about arranged marriages - a misunderstanding I would say. Arranged marriages don’t happen without the consent of the bride and the groom. These days as more and more Indians are educated, it not blind submissive decision as the world sees it(There are few exceptions of course!). Most of the cases, people share pictures and details and see if it meets the requirement from both the end and it proceeds. Here you marry and Fall in love.
For a 4th generation Christian like me, faith in Christ is like arranged marriage. My Parents found Christ as their savior and they passed their faith on to me. I, when I found him a true Savior by my own will, I accepted him in my life. That is how arranged marriage works, the parents look for a suitable guy/gal and tell their son/daughter about it and only if the gal or guy is willing they proceed with it.
Of course like in India, In Christ we do have love marriages.
GR,
Thanks for sharing. What a wonderful analogy to our marriage with Christ.
India is truly a remarkable place. It seems to be exploding with potential and energy. I still marvel at the architecture from the 1400 and 1500’s.
The best,
Ed