“You have Pancreatic cancer.”
They were the most devastating words a man could hear. My head dropped. I couldn’t look up. The world stopped.
After conquering heart disease 30 months ago, I now have a new attacker. And this one is far more deadly. Don’t Google it and read the mortality rates, or you’ll have me buried before you finish this post. I had myself buried before I left the doctor’s office Wednesday evening. It seemed hopeless.
It was heartbreaking traveling from house to house that night to tell my kids. We were all crying. My girls were cuddled up with me on the couch, trying to relive a safer time in their dad’s arms.
The kids then followed us back to Lafayette so we could all be together. Our world had changed forever. We were all trying to grasp the reality. We prayed together and agreed that we wouldn’t complain. We wouldn’t fail to trust God. We would still be thankful when all seemed lost.
We hoped we could be.
The next morning I began to call family and friends. Emails came pouring in. The response was stunning. I was surrounded in spirit by those that love me. Grown men were crying and telling me how much I meant to them. Friends were praying with me on the phone. Friends from Atlanta, South Carolina, Virginia, Dallas, Phoenix, and all across the Midwest. They offered to fly and drive in to support me. It was clear that they would do whatever it took to be there for us.
And my spirit began to change. With each expression of “perfect love” from the people in my life, the clouds were nudged further back and the sun’s rays began to poke through. By Friday I sensed hope again. I developed a will to fight. I developed a passion to fight. I developed a resolve to win.
And for the first time, I fully grasped God’s promise that “perfect love casts out all fear.” The “perfect love” of my family and friends had pushed the darkness away. Hope quietly but confidently resurfaced.
I was humbled as I grasped how casual I have been about showing my own affection toward others. I now realize how important it is to daily express to my wife, kids, friends, and others just how important they are to me.
Please, go do that now with the people in your life.
I have a long road ahead of me. The first step is this Tuesday (7:30 AM) when I have surgery to remove the tumor. Please pray that the cancer hasn’t spread. Please pray for my family.
Because of your “perfect love,” I will fight regardless of what happens. I will fight to win this battle. And there is a real chance since we caught the cancer early. There is a chance because I have such remarkable emotional and prayer support. There is a chance because I’m young and healthy. There is a chance because I love you all and you deserve my very best.
We have set up a Caring Bridge web site at caringbridge.org/visit/edbahler if you’d like to stay in touch.
In the last year, 3 from our Aspen team heard a diagnosis of cancer for either themself or a close member of their family. 1 of those was pancreatic cancer, and yes, the prognosis wasn’t encouraging. But one year later, after surgeries and treatments, all of of those families now have a cancer survivor amongst them….each being cancer free. We’ll all be praying and believing the same for you.
Thanks Lynn. I love and need these messages of hope. Thanks for reaching out!!
So sorry to hear about your diagnosis. My prayers are with you and your family. I so appreciated your post on perfect love and am confident that you will fight this with the same fervor and passion in which I remember you doing with everything you attempted. Col 1:11 “May you be strengthened with all power, according to His glorious might.”
Hi Sandy,
I miss you. Thanks for stopping by and sharing your love and prayers. I need you to fight a great fight!
Ed
Ed, I’m so encouraged by your response and how God’s grown within you a passion to fight back. I’m praying for you and your family and believing in faith with you.
Ed,
I was informed yesterday at church by my sister-in-law of your recent diagnosis. I want you to know that my husband and I will be bathing you and your family in prayer! Your family has always had a special place in my heart! I am SOOO thankful for your testimony and love for Christ, and can already tell that God is going to use this trial to reach many people that you have touched over the past years.
We will pray for your health, your family, your trust in Christ, and your endurance in this trial. I pray that God will wrap his arms of comfort around you and your family.
In Him,
Shana Greiner (Honn)
Ed,
I heard about your diagnosis this past Thursday and have not stopped thinking about you and your family and praying for you. It’s so good to read here of your faith in a faithful God. We love you and will not stop praying…for all of you.
-Bek
Ed, that is (almost) devastating news….if not for the quality of your faith and the mercies of our Lord.
You are one of the finest people in my life and I will commit to pray for you as many times as I reasonably can…. Fight it brother. If anyone can knock it off, you can.
Know that we are with you and are not prepared to let go on your behalf!
Kindest
Alan
Thanks everyone…..I would love to respond to every comment. I love you all.
But I have to get prayed up and focused to take on this surgery in the morning.
Please keep me in your prayers. God is holding me up in ways I could have never imagined.
Grateful,
Ed
Ed,
We share a son and daughter. We are Papa to 5 of the most precious boys on the earth. We are also the same age, and this news has affected me deeply. Please embrace the most positive mind and attitude as you move through these next landmarks. Your outlook of trust will help carry you and your family. “Be still and know that I am God”.
You fight hard. Those boys need 2 Papas
You have our Love and Prayers
Scott
Ed, here’s my “Lord help me handle this”,prayer. It works well, even when my knees are like Jell-o;
Oh Lord, grant me to greet the coming day in peace. Help me in all things to rely upon Your Holy will; in every hour of the day, reveal Your will to me. Bless my dealings with all who surround me. Teach me to treat all that comes to me throughout the day with peace of soul and firm conviction that Your will governs all. In all my deeds and words guide my thoughts and feelings. In unforeseen events, let me not forget that all are sent by You. Teach me to act firmly and wisely without embittering and embarrassing others. Grant me the strength to bear the fatigue of the coming day. Direct my will. Teach me to pray; and, Yourself, pray in me. Amen.
Bob Bowerman
Ed,
I agree with Alan, if anyone can kick this, you can! So sad to hear this news… will be praying for you and your family. One of my favorite verses:
Isaiah 41:10 “So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”
-Andrea Dill
Be strong Ed. I will be praying for you and especially for the family. I am sure that all will be as He has designed for you and that it will be perfect!!!
No need to respond, just know that I’m praying!
Ed and family,
Our prayers are with you. May God bless you and do a mighty work thru you at this time!
Love you all,
Louanne and Scott Condreay